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You've had a survival blog for
4 years and your husband/wife doesn't know.
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Your family does not know
there's a case of Dinty Moore stew hidden in the basement
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You stand around the office
water cooler laughing with your buddies about all those tin-foil hat
wearers – but you have your own roll of Reynolds Wrap at home.
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You're an anonymous poster on
Infowars.
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While you were supposed to be
grocery shopping, you were checking out escape routes out of the city.
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You've got a Swiss Army knife
on your keychain that looks like a roach clip, instead of a roach clip
that looks like a Swiss Army knife.
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You've read The Turner
Diaries with a flashlight under the bed covers, so now you think
you know what's coming.
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You download Steve Quayle's
podcasts to your i-pod so you can listen to him on your way to work,
alone.
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You anonymously put your
spouse on a mailing list for wilderness vacation pots.
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You've got a browser bookmarks
folder named “Recipes” that includes links to Survival Blog,
Preparedness Society Forum, the Economic Collapse Blog, Survival Mom,
and Surviving Survivalism.
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You've told your in-laws that
the camping equipment in the garage is because you love the great
outdoors.
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You've convinced yourself that
you like the taste of freeze-dried storage foods.
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You play the video game,
Half-Life II to practice what you will do when chaos breaks out.
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Doomsday Preppers is
your favorite TV show, but you have to TiVO it so you can watch it when
your family is out of the house.
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You've asked a survivalist
group to try to convince your spouse that prepping is a good idea.
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Your family thinks you've
become a religious fanatic, but every Sunday morning you are really
taking trips into the wilderness.
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You tell your wife the gas
mask you bought is to spark up your sex life – you'd rather have her
think you're a pervert than a prepper.
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You run a large “off-grid”
website from your London apartment, but you tell your friends it's just
for the monthly Google Analytics check.
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You tell your neighbors that
you bought a HumVee for its gas mileage.
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You visit different survival
communities every weekend, telling your girlfriend/boyfriend that “It's
just a free camping weekend!”
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You've built a house out of
rocks deep in the woods while your wife/husband thought you were taking
philosophy classes at the local college.
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While you are in the bathroom
getting ready for work, you day dream about leaving society behind and
living the self-sufficient life.
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You pray that company doesn't
want to stay overnight, because if you open the sofa bed they'll see
all your Survival magazines.
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You're just waiting for the
day when you can say, “See? I told you!”